Woman Refuses to Walk Faster Even Though Man Has Been Holding Door for 30 Seconds

side profile of elegant woman wearing shades and big black coat

CHICAGO – Earlier today, a woman in her own world moved at a leisurely pace atypical of someone on her way to work. She’d just endured a super cramped train ride, and while she didn’t have much time to spare, she had no intention of breaking her neck to get to the office.

She had a busy day ahead but wasn’t ready for the hectic pace to start just yet. With all the serious and not-so-serious thoughts swirling around in her mind, she was completely oblivious to the hopeful doofus who’d been holding the door of the Starbucks open in obvious anticipation of her arrival.

While the man stood there, allowing streams of people to exit and some street garbage to blow indoors, the distracted woman mentally recited the main points of presentation she would be giving later this morning, remembered that she had an important email to write, and wondered wtf was going on in the episode of Mr. Robot she’d seen last night. Then, just as she laid eyes on the café door, she began mentally replaying her cat’s screwball antics from earlier that morning. This made her smile, giving the man more false hope. He smiled back a pushed the door open even wider in excitement.

The door holder felt confident, even as another 15 seconds or so ticked off the clock. Once again distracted, she spotted some sweet Nike running gear in a nearby store display. He used the extra time to hastily rehearse some witty banter and just as he was about to boldly make eye contact, she breezed past with a cheery “thanks,” completely stoked to find zero people in line ahead of her.