Cop Can’t Tell If That’s a Prostitute or a Teenager


HOUSTON – Officer Timothy McCarron was making his rounds as usual on Monday afternoon when he caught sight of a “lady of the evening” out on the street in broad daylight. He begun to radio the station to call it in but then he stopped to consider the matter.

“It confused me at first,” Officer McCarron explained. “To me it was clear she was soliciting her body. I mean I’ve busted women who were wearing more but in such a public place? I mean in front of the Old Town Library…It just seemed bizarre.”

His pause it turns out was quite sensible, as the scene then developed further. The woman in question was quickly joined by 4 other scantily clad women. “They were jumping around, hooting and laughing,” McCarron explained. “Not at all normal behavior for streetwalkers. My first thought was that this was going to turn in to an all-out drug bust, but then I saw the school crest pinned to her bag.”

Yes it turns out this flourish of ambiguously attired young ladies was no more than a Montgomery High study group, preparing for their English Lit test later that week. We reached out and spoke to one of the students of the group: Crystal Micheli.

“That’s soo funny!” Crystal exclaimed after we informed her of the confusion. “The library is actually pretty cold so I bundled up for extra warmth” she said, tugging on the hem of her mini dress. On a lighter note, when asked how she thought she did on her exam, Crystal replied “Well I don’t want to sell myself short, but I think I nailed it.”