Ad Revenue From Satire Websites Will Save Nation From Economic Collapse

Larger than life size bronze sculptures. Figures with laughing faces.

NEW YORK – Financial markets that initially responded negatively to the prospect of a Trump presidency, are well on their way to a robust recovery. The primary reason for this reversal was an analyst’s report forecasting an unprecedented uptick in the amount of satirical websites that will sprout up in this volatile political climate.

The subsequent growth of these sites will lead to tremendous gains in the web publishing and advertising sector. The mountains of cash coming from billions of potential clicks would be enough to offset any disastrous policy decisions that would result from implementing President-Elect Trump’s economic agenda.

“We’re thinking The Onion could potentially go the IPO route if things get bad enough,” said hedge fund analyst, Thad Worthington. “I’m not one to throw words like unicorn around, but we could be talking unicorn, baby!”
While established players are well positioned to thrive in these hilariously dire times, there is plenty of room for brash young upstarts like New Roman Times to cash in.

That says nothing about the residual benefits to local economies. Economist Todd Bingham speculated that snark tech could usher in a wave of development that would not just be centered in the nation’s snooty metropolitan areas.

“Oh yeah, middle America gets jokes too – for the most part. We’re talking major increases in hiring for industries that have been stagnant for a long time. The sheer amount of writers for instance, that will suddenly be able to afford food and booze will have an enormous impact. It could spur construction booms and jump start food trucks in the most unlikely places. I’m talking taco trucks on every street corner.