About Us

New Roman Times Wasn’t Built in a Day

47 B.C.: New Roman Times was Founded by Julius Caesar’s neighbor’s co-worker’s great uncle Maximus Funnius. At the time articles were written on clay tablets, but Funnius’s vision was always to publish on innovative, handheld scrolling technology.

Some Original New Roman Times Headlines include:
· Naming Rights to Colosseum go to Little Caesars Pizza
· Chariot Fines Double in Construction Zone
· Today’s Betting Line: Lions Plus Three Over Christians
· Spartacus Signs Lucrative Sponsorship Deal with Gladiatorade
· Marco Polo Brings Roman Candles to China
· Cartographers Go Bankrupt When Emperor Has All Roads Lead to Rome

476: Times were tough during the Fall of the Roman Empire, but fortunately humor prevailed

1440: Gutenberg’s Printing Press was invented, and productivity improved at New Roman Times

1450: Decks of cards were invented, and productivity declined at New Roman Times

1492: Columbus Accidentally delivered New Roman Times to the new world

1501: A New Roman Times Editor modeled for Michaelangelo’s David

1902: New Roman Times had its first newscast on Marconi’s radio

1974: Al Gore invented the Internet, and New Roman Times went online