CORAL KEY PARK, FL- Today Michael Cohen inked a deal with ABC to fill the now vacant timeslot left behind by the recently cancelled Roseanne. Filling the half-hour gap will be ABC’s newest reboot, Flipper: focused on the frolicking and flipping antics of TV’s most loveable porpoise – as played by Michael Cohen. News later broke that, along with Cohen, ABC has also signed special counsel Robert Mueller who says he’s wanted to work with Cohen for ages.
“Oh he’s a star alright,” said Mueller of Cohen. “I had seen his early work that he did for the Russians and thought to myself, we gotta get this guy.”
The story will follow Mueller playing himself as he leads a crusade against a ruthless billionaire who’s threatening to bring down the sunny beach resort Coral Key Park. Along the way, Mueller recruits the help of everyone’s favorite fish-faced friend to help him take on the billionaire.
Despite being a family show, ABC hinted at a rather dark plot line that will deal with themes including adultery, bank fraud, porn stars, and pee tapes. Those hoping for lots of screen time for Cohen might be in for a surprise however as a leaked script shows Flipper in captivity for the second half of the season.